Filing for a divorce is a major undertaking. Your case will likely have many twists and turns, and you will face roadblocks before you’re officially divorced. How can you prepare for these challenges, and what are the top things you should know before you file for divorce?
1. Know What Kind of Case You Have
This may sound obvious, but you need to know what kind of divorce you have before you file. Is your divorce contested, or uncontested? Will child custody be an issue? What about marital assets?
The type of divorce you have will determine how your case plays out. Uncontested cases are resolved easily and quickly, whereas contested matters are longer and more complex.
2. Hire an Attorney before You File
Divorce is one of the biggest battles you will ever face, and you need to be prepared. Hiring an experienced divorce and family law attorney is the best way to do this. Attorneys are a dime a dozen, and some are more qualified than others. Make sure you consult with 3 to 4 lawyers before making your final selection.
3. Know the Truth about Divorce
The unfortunate truth about divorce is that it is unpredictable. Working with an attorney to create a winning divorce strategy is great, but it isn’t full proof. Things will happen during your divorce that can throw a wrench in your plans. Keep an open mind, and trust that your lawyer is working to get your case back on track.
4. No Two Cases are Alike
Each and every divorce case is different. These are very personal matters, and the details of your case will depend on many different factors. The length of your marriage, the amount of assets, and whether or not you have children, all have an impact.
We encourage all of our clients to turn to friends and family members for emotional support during their divorce. With that being said, be cautious when it comes to taking their advice. It is likely you know someone who has gone through a divorce, and they may be willing to pass on words of wisdom. Just remember that their case is different than yours, and what worked for them may not be best for you.
5. You Won’t Be Divorced in a Month
The timeline for a divorce in New York varies. An uncontested divorce can take anywhere between 4 to 6 months to be signed by a judge, after all papers are submitted. Contested cases have been known to last years.
New York State does process expedited divorce cases, however, you must meet special requirements in order to get one. Some of the most common reasons people apply for an expedited divorce include military service, pregnancy, and issues surrounding immigration. Meet with an attorney before you file to determine if you can get an expedited divorce.
6. Co-Parenting Takes a Lot of Work
One of the hardest parts of divorce is co-parenting. Learning how to co-parent with your ex takes a lot of work, and doesn’t always come naturally. Figuring out successful co-parenting strategy involves trial and error, but it is worth it.
There are a lot of methods and tools to help make the co-parenting transition easier. You can try alternative forms of co-parenting, like parallel parenting. Depending on the kind of relationship you have with your ex, you may even decide to live together after divorce.
7. You Will Lose Friends
Divorce is an upheaval. It has the possibility to shake the foundation of your life. It is not uncommon for parties to lose the support system of their friends and in-laws. Your friends will feel forced to take sides, or they may even walk away altogether.
As disheartening as this reality is, it does have a silver lining. Divorce allows you to see who your true friends are, and opens you up to having new experiences and meeting new people. It’s sad to lose so many people you care about as a result of your divorce, but you’ll get through it.
Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C. is a New York City based divorce and family law firm. Their team of dedicated attorneys specialize in complex divorce cases, and represent clients in all five boroughs. For more information, or to schedule your free consultation, call 718-875-7584 today!