Social media isn’t just part of our lives—it is our lives. From Instagram stories to Facebook status updates and TikTok dances, what we post online can say more than we realize. Social media plays a powerful role in divorce cases—fueling conflicts, revealing secrets, and serving as court-admissible evidence.
Family law attorneys now routinely warn clients: everything you post, like, or share could be scrutinized during litigation. And yes, even that cryptic tweet or “just a meme” could come back to haunt you.
Social Media’s Link to Divorce
A survey from British attorneys Slater and Gordon reports that 1 in 4 Britons have considered filing for divorce based on their spouse’s activity on Twitter, Facebook, Skype, or SnapChat accounts. Such activity ranges from interactions with former flames, to a lack of posts that include their significant others.
Of those surveyed, a whopping 50% admitted to checking their partner’s social media profiles behind their backs, with about 15% stating they considered filing for divorce based on their findings. In a separate study conducted by the American Association of Matrimonial Lawyers (AAML), over 80% of attorneys have seen an increase in the amount of social media evidence presented during divorce proceedings. These numbers are a direct result of the prominent role social media plays in society.
The 7 Golden Rules of Social Media in Divorce
Digital communication makes our day-to-day lives easier, but it also has its pitfalls. In order to protect yourself during divorce, there are certain rules you should follow:
1. Change your passwords and privacy settings.
It is important to change all of your passwords if you are worried about you ex logging in and checking your messages. Increased security settings will help to maintain your privacy during divorce.
2. Don’t trash talk your ex.
Speaking negatively about your former spouse can add fuel to the fire and create additional hurdles and stress to overcome during your action. Take the high road and remain civil, or simply do not discuss your case on social media.
3. Be mindful of the photos you post.
Do not post photos of yourself partying, drinking, or doing drugs. Such evidence may lead you to lose custody of your children because you will appear reckless and unable to provide adequate care.
4. Do not cyberstalk your ex or their friends and family members.
Obsessing over your former flame is unhealthy. Resist the urge to check up on them by unfollowing your ex and their friends or family members. You’ll be much happier.
5. Remember that everything on the internet is permanent.
Apps like SnapChat promise to delete all content after it is viewed, but receivers still have the ability to take a screencap and save an image. The same can be done on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn. Once released into the ether, social media content is permanently out there.
6. Use common sense.
Using common sense is a surefire method to ensure that your social media activity cannot be used against you in a divorce or child custody proceeding. Do you have to think twice before posting a status update or photo? Is there a little voice telling you not to? Listen to it. Be safe, and trust your instincts.
7. Delete or deactivate accounts.
If you think that you will be unable to play it safe on social media, then you should consider deleting or deactivating your accounts for the duration of your action. It’s better to go without Facebook for a few months than have your activity come back to haunt you before you’ve reached a settlement.
How Social Media Can Impact Your Divorce Case
Your social media activity can influence nearly every aspect of your divorce case, including:
- Child custody decisions: Posts depicting excessive partying, drug or alcohol use, or unstable behavior can be used to question your fitness as a parent.
- Alimony and financial disputes: Bragging about lavish vacations, expensive purchases, or a new job while claiming financial hardship? That can come back to bite you in support negotiations.
- Division of assets: Sharing photos or details of unreported assets or newly acquired valuables might raise red flags during property division.
- Credibility: Inconsistencies between your court statements and what’s posted online can undermine your credibility.
Facebook: The #1 Divorce Minefield
Facebook is often ground zero for divorce-related drama. It’s one of the easiest ways for opposing counsel to collect damaging screenshots—especially when mutual friends are still following both parties. Don’t assume your posts are private just because your account is.
Pro Tip: Unfriend or unfollow your ex and adjust your privacy settings—but don’t delete or hide content if you’re already in the middle of litigation. Doing so could be seen as destroying evidence.
Social Media Platforms to Keep an Eye on if Divorcing
When going through a divorce, assume that anything you post online could become part of your case. While Facebook is the most commonly referenced platform in court, it’s far from the only one. Here’s a near-exhaustive list of social platforms, apps, and digital trails that can get you into legal hot water:
🔵 Mainstream Social Media
- Facebook – Posts, comments, likes, shared memories, private messages, group activity.
- Instagram – Photos, reels, stories, tagged posts, DMs, follower activity.
- TikTok – Videos, live streams, duets, comments, captions, activity history.
- Twitter (X) – Tweets, retweets, replies, quote tweets, DMs.
- Snapchat – Disappearing messages, snaps, stories, and location tracking via Snap Map.
- LinkedIn – Job announcements, exaggerated employment claims, networking with new partners or co-workers.
📸 Photo & Video Sharing
- YouTube – Personal vlogs, comments, live chat transcripts, community posts.
- BeReal – Real-time daily snapshots showing location and activities.
- VSCO – Photo uploads that may show lifestyle inconsistencies.
🟢 Messaging Apps & Forums
- WhatsApp / Telegram / Signal – Private messages can be subpoenaed.
- Facebook Messenger – Easy to forget, but often full of screenshots used as evidence.
- Discord – Used for chatting in communities or private servers—still admissible.
- Reddit – Posts and comment history can reveal personal views, habits, or rants.
🌍 Location-Based & Lifestyle Apps
- Google Maps / Timeline – Location history and check-ins can reveal movement patterns.
- Yelp – Reviews or comments that reference specific outings, relationships, or finances.
- Venmo / Cash App – Public payment notes (yes, even emojis) can hint at hidden spending or relationships.
💕 Dating & Relationship Apps
- Tinder / Bumble / Hinge – Having a profile while still legally married may hurt your credibility or impact custody.
- Grindr / HER / Feeld – Alternative dating apps can also surface during litigation.
- OnlyFans – Whether subscribing or posting, it may raise red flags depending on the case.
🎮 Gaming & Virtual Worlds
- Twitch / Xbox Live / PlayStation Network – Public interactions or excessive playtime might be used to question parenting time or behavior.
- Roblox / Fortnite / VRChat – Digital conversations aren’t immune to legal discovery.
Social Media is Changing the Legal Landscape
Given our societal need to share every aspect of our lives with friends, family, and followers, it comes as no surprise that social media profiles and posts are playing an ever prominent role in the discovery process. Some parties will try to hide assets from their ex-spouse during divorce, however, they will post photos or statuses boasting about expensive purchases, such as a new car or lavish vacation. These posts will act as evidence, proving that a party is lying about his or her assets or net worth.
One of Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C. memorable court cases, where feuding spouses were involved in a highly contested divorce, used social media to fight for our clients’ right to their children and a great deal of assets. The defendant, a small business owner, claimed that he was not involved in the opening or operation of a new location of his company. Our firm’s client, the plaintiff, was facing the very real possibility that she and her children would not receive a fair and accurate amount of alimony and support. After diligent research, Brian and his team found Facebook, Yelp, and Twitter posts that proved the defendant was actively involved and benefiting from his company’s new location. Without this crucial social media evidence, it would have been nearly impossible to prove to the court that the defendant was trying to hide assets.
“When you work with me, you’re gaining an advocate who is relentless in uncovering the truth and ensuring your voice is heard. At Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C., we are committed to securing a fair outcome and holding the opposing party accountable — firmly, respectfully, and within the full extent of the law.”
- Brian D. Perskin, NYC Divorce Attorney
Hire a Brooklyn Divorce Lawyer
There is only so much a plaintiff or defendant can do on their own during a divorce or child custody proceeding. The expert attorneys at Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C. specialize in contested and hard-to-handle cases. The lawyers dedicate their time to providing top notch representation, from the initial filing of paperwork, to prolonged discovery production periods, and straight through to litigation and settlement. Contact Brian and his staff to schedule a free and confidential consultation today!